Apparently a sub 8 male giving you a compliment is worse than a life of misery and loneliness.

to women it actually is. Their biological sensors go haywire and they think "does he actually think he has a chance with me? am I ugly?"

It's a truly frightening thing for them, even being talked to by a sub 8. God forbid one actually asks them out on a date or flirts with them.

Validation can be annoying if it's constant. Like you're trying to go about your day make the mistake of making eye contact with a guy and smile and he comes over ready to lay some pickup artist moves he paid for.

Like it gets tiring telling them you're not interested. Like "no I don't want your number, I want to finish buying my groceries, thanks"

That's why some women just make up bfs and claim they have one asap. Faster that way.

lol maybe don't tell guys its about personality and they wont try to drop the tryhard cheesy pick up lines on you.

They would anyways. This isn't anything new.

Because googling something and repeating it to some woman is definitely a reflection of YOUR personality.

OK fine, emphasize creativity then. How often are women actually receptive to quirky pickup lines in real life anyway? I understand you're in an awkward spot to be asked out in public often but I can't think of any real instances where it actually works out.

Cheesy tryhard pickup lines have nothing to do with personality, it just screams "desperate".

Even if I've got the definition of personality wrong, the point still remains that guys need to be told what their innate value is and that there's NOTHING they can do to change it. Not just looks either. Intelligence and "coolness" are pretty much innate as well.

Sorry but my Computer Science degree isn't innate and I'm still working for it.

The prerequisite intelligence for it IS. It's OK, you don't have to feel guilty for being superior to others by chance. That's just life. Embrace your privileges and don't pretend some retard has the same chances as you in Comp Sci or that some ugly shit has the same chances of ever being considered a good fuck as you.

I am fucking garbage at math and generally suck at everything else besides programming so I wouldn't really call myself einstein, yet I'm still in free spot paid by government, studying what I like, because I worked/working for it.

Define "garbage at math", is that "only" getting a B in Calc II? Just lol

How many AP courses did you take in high school (if American)? If 2-3+ you just have the impostor syndrome that afflicts many intelligent people.

Barely made it through Calc II, landing in solid 5 (need to get over 4.5 from every single grade in subject to pass).

In Lithuania we don't have such thing unless I misunderstand it, and I never took any additional courses, only as much as I needed.

Ended highschool with 100% in programming, 86% English and the rest were 56% (math) and below.

Idk man, I failed Calc II. Had to drop out before it hurt my report card. My ineptitude and sluggishness in day-to-day interactions suggests I'm not too bright either.

Yeah and amount of hours spent trying to learn as much as you can so you don't drop out could probably be counted on one hands fingers.

It's embarrassing to have to spend countless hours just to keep up with the class. Much more reasonable to just hang with people on your level.

So you did nothing and you dropped out, probably because you simply aren't intelligent enough and not because you didn't do anything to learn it /s

there is literally nothing you can say to these guys to make them realise that they are personally responsible for their lack of gf.

That means I can never fuck up, perfect lolcows.

Well see I disagree... Women can be brutal when it comes to men hitting on them... This is because of years of unwanted attention that have made some ladies bitter...

But i do feel like self esteem plays the biggest roll here. I've had a few guys send me pictures to rate and I'm honestly shocked. They will explain themselves to me like they are disgusting or hideous. But then they send a picture and most of the time I find them to be decently attractive.

But hey that's just me

Embarrassment of riches. Foids have it so easy theyre complaining about getting too much attention or from the wrong guys.. they would rope if they switched bodies with an incel for a year.

I imagine if a woman swapped body with an incel they would get laid quite quickly as they would know what certain women want. Like if I was an incel, I am like... 90% sure I could get a friend of mine to sleep with me, easily.

This has been done before. A woman did an experiment and changed herself into a man, and asked women out. She was surprised at how brutally sue was rejected and said she had never experienced anything like it before.

I mean, define "brutally"?

Watch it and see.

Oh yeah I've seen that video before (actually subbed to that channel too.)

It's not really enough to claim 100% predictability in every case but I'm not going to pretend that women don't hold power in a date. They are typically approached after all. But there's also the reverse to consider. Since women typically do not approach, they often don't, even when they want to. They have to drop signs and hints to make the person they want feel comfortable enough to approach. If they don't, that can also hurt.

I actually remember this one guy in summer school in high school. I really liked him. Sweet kid. We helped each other with math. Anyways, the last day approaches and I asked him... something like "So what are you going to do now?" in hopes that he would take that as a hint to ask me out.

He said something like "Going to go home and take a nap. See ya." and I never saw him again. It wasn't really brutal and I kind of brush that as me not being clear enough, but I was disappointed. I can laugh at it now.

Okay well I never got that. I never got an opportunity to take up an offer like that because no woman has even indicated that she is interested in me.

Why didn’t you just say I think you’re really cute or something. Tf is that supposed to mean.

Hindsight. I was like 17 or something. Figured I was clear enough.

The girl thought that she could woo women by being a woman in a man's body. After her experiment, she realized that women want manly men.

When she revealed she was a woman, she got better attention than as a man.

Like if I was homeless, I am like... 90% sure I could get a decent job, easily.

Certainly not impossible.

Year? They would not last a few days.

Wanna switch bodies? I'm a 5'5" ugly Arab male. The grass is greener on the other side srs.

I'm pretty happy where I am.

Then stop claiming that being an attractive woman is just as bad. You know it's not.

Never made that claim. Simply said it can be annoying.

You think that compares at all?

It does in a way. You become jaded from all the validation. Certain words and phrases lose meaning. Like if anyone tells me I'm cute, I have zero reaction. Stuff like that. It sucks because you begin to question the sincerity people have.

Allow me not to feel bad for you at all.

Simply put living at an extreme isn't fun for anyone. I feel where women and incels connect is through the fact we both live at an extreme. This doesn't down play the incel struggles but nor should it down play a women's struggles either.

Rather then compare scars why not accept we are both a group of people who feel wronged. I really believe that if more women could see that maybe more would make their way to defending you all and shutting down IT.

No way that's happening. Your issues are "annoyances" at worst, no way comparable in ANY way whatsoever.

Lol just annoyances... I could list off over thousands f times I've been treated like meat or looked down on due to my appearance.

My boss once told me if I lost 30lbs I'd be sexy as hell... In the middle of a meeting.

I've been followed, had some guy suck his teeth at me and say nice ass under his breath.

You think that's just an annoyance? Its a matter of feeling safe... You think when I get that reaction it makes me feel safe at all? Fuck no I will go the long way home to make sure that guy doesn't follow me.

I wouldn't call it a minor.

Just as you think we are down playing your struggle I find it goes both ways

Hey, starving Africans! You should feel bad for me, I have heart disease.

This isn't about who needs more pitty o.o. Literally I am not claiming my issues are in anyway similar just that we both live in an extreme which will always have it's downsides.

T.T I get it I'll never fully understand whst being an incel is but it doesn't mean I can't try and extend an olive branch.

Your "downside" is exactly what incels want. Attention. If you stopped getting it, you'd miss it.

No incel would ever miss being an ugly virgin.

That is a valid point for sure... Well I'd love to be a part of this community even just to give advice or talk to men who have bad anxiety. I may not be the most informed but I sure want to try my best.

I've been in therapy a long time and don't get me wrong I'm no expert but hey it's free and I'm willing lol

Pretty sure i already told you i don't really care, you're not making me feel bad at all.

Even then, it's still not comparable at all. And those would be annoyances if you got a thicker skin. Why are you even on an incel forum? Your experiences aren't even relevant at all.

I just wanted to reach out maybe chat up a few... I suffer from depression and anxiety which seems to be a common theme here, so I figured maybe I could help someone.

I also considered suggesting an incels gaming group... For me finding a group of friends to game with had helped my anxiety a ton...

So ya no real reason just a concerned lady.

Well, that's fine but you can't equate your problems to ours, it's on another level that you can't even understand by the looks of it.

Fair.. well either way I'm sorry if I came off in any negative way and thanks for the chat... Btw feel free to message me if you just want to chat 😊

I suffer from depression and anxiety which seems to be a common theme here, so I figured maybe I could help someone

The problem here is that you can get validation in spite of that, an option the people here by and large simply don't have.

Fair, and honestly i wish I wasn't so clueless but I would be willing to chat with a few get to know them maybe even shine some light on all the negativity.

Meh maybe it's just wishful thinking... I just want to fix things when it's not my job to do so lol

I wasn't so clueless

To be fair, why wouldn't you be? You've never lived the life of a person that would relate to this subreddit, so it kinda checks out.

maybe even shine some light on all the negativity.

In my case it exists because I look like a serial killer, hence people don't like me.

See a lot of the guys on here have claimed similar stuff but everyone is their harshest critic

I've been told so (after getting surgery to fix my lazy eye and my jaw, before that I was just ugly), so it's not just something I believe myself I'm afraid. It's very observable in peoples reactions to me as well.

People are cruel and I'm sorry they feel the need to put you down just to make themselves feel better.. fucking assholes

Thank you. That's just how it is I guess.

Well if you ever wanna chat feel free to message me... I'm happy to help anyone who is willing to ask... Or hell even if you just wanna chat...

Hope you have a good day

List off the over thousands of times you've had advantages for being an (allegedly) attractive women.

Meh I give up.. you win..

Validation can be annoying if it's constant

Better than barely or no validation at all.

Honestly fuck those girls.

this is a basic convo between an incel and a girl: I:i'm a victim here f:NO, i'm the victim here i:NO, i'm the victim here f:NO, i'm the victim here I:NO, i'm the victim here f:NO, i'm the victim here i:NO, i'm the victim here etc.

It depends, girls i know have been groped and shit because guys think theyre fit.

Foids should STFU, no doubt.

I don't think it's necessarily the catcalling such as yelling something from a passing car, but harassment. I know a few girls who sometimes get followed when coming home from the buses, stuff like that, which is creepy and could end up with them being in danger or hurt.

Also, there's the fact that many are seen as objects and not people. Generally, where I live at least, women have to get higher grades in school and do more work to be regarded with the same seriousness and respect as men, women get laughed at for having sex/getting broken up with, although it's written into the law that it's illegal to pay someone less because of their gender women are still paid less and some companies are less likely to hire women, etc. There's still a lot of bias and misogyny towards women and it is difficult to be a woman sometimes. It's hard to be a man too, for other reasons as well as similar reasons, mainly from society's expectations and norms (from my PoV anyway).

Also, really? People don't ever hold doors open for you? I see people hold the door open all the time for literally anyone!

There are lots of kind women. They are just repulsed by an ugly man’s face. Not their fault, it’s genetics and conditioning.

Its like an obese person complaining about his situation to a starving african child.

I mean sure, obesity does cause a lot of health issues and changing your habits to lose weight can be difficult, but don't go around bitching about it to starving people.

It's not socially validating to bully incels anymore. So now they're trying to co opt the struggle for the street cred the status confers.

I think it's because in both situations you aren't really treated as a human. Being catcalled feels like you're only an object and that nobody wants to spend time with you for who you are, only for how you look. Being an incel is also like you're not a human as you get treated like trash, and again nobody wants to spend time with you for who you are, BECAUSE of how you look.

I do think being catcalled is much easier than being completely ignored because you still have that chance to make meaningful relationships if you're noticed, but there is a small comparison to be made there. I hope I don't offend anyone.

Idk man, I failed Calc II. Had to drop out before it hurt my report card. My ineptitude and sluggishness in day-to-day interactions suggests I'm not too bright either.

Simply put living at an extreme isn't fun for anyone. I feel where women and incels connect is through the fact we both live at an extreme. This doesn't down play the incel struggles but nor should it down play a women's struggles either.

Rather then compare scars why not accept we are both a group of people who feel wronged. I really believe that if more women could see that maybe more would make their way to defending you all and shutting down IT.

Lol just annoyances... I could list off over thousands f times I've been treated like meat or looked down on due to my appearance.

My boss once told me if I lost 30lbs I'd be sexy as hell... In the middle of a meeting.

I've been followed, had some guy suck his teeth at me and say nice ass under his breath.

You think that's just an annoyance? Its a matter of feeling safe... You think when I get that reaction it makes me feel safe at all? Fuck no I will go the long way home to make sure that guy doesn't follow me.

I wouldn't call it a minor.