They probably do as they've had a life time of being accepted and treated well by others rather than being rejected and left incel by their ugliness thus turning them bitter, twisted and angry...
The girls who treated me the worst where always the uggos. Maybe they where going for an easy target to score points, or maybe they really where shitty people.
No? I’m fairly decent looking and I’ve even had girls approach me at clubs. My only relationship was with a very attractive girl who I believed was way out of my league - to the extent that I started to try to overcompensate by taking steroids and spending ridiculous amounts of money to visit her multiple times a year (I was studying in another country).
You know what cost me the relationship? I was so fucking insecure. At one point, I was so obsessively paranoid that I blew several thousand bucks on gambling to get the paranoia off my mind - bear in mind I had never touched a drug by that point.
My own anxiety and insecurity cost me a relationship with a girl that turned down guys on a daily basis because she loved me.
The reason she broke up with me was because her father (a policemen) realised that I was restricting her freedom and wasn’t doing stretches that I should’ve been doing every day to deal with the fact that I couldn’t walk 50 yards at times.
I blamed her for everything after she broke it off. I blamed women and I never even considered how undesirable I made myself through my own negative mindset and actions.
I kept believing she deserved better and she did because I treated her as if she did.
So don’t make up nonsense that looks are what gets you a girl. It’s so bullshit.
Anxiety, depression, and a negative philosophy of life are what leave you single for the rest of your life.
There is literally a quadriplegic motivational speaker that has a wife and kids because he made the best out of his circumstances, rather than falling a victim to them and saying, “boo-hoo, I was born this way”.
I had to study the Halo effect in Social
Psychology lectures.
Dentures can replace missing teeth aesthetic-wise.
You can make your nose appear better by shifting the focus to a different part of your face (such as with a beard or specific glasses that suit you).
Color blindness isn’t the be-all and end-all. A really good friend of mine is color blind and he has never mentioned it more than once.
Hearing aids can assist with hearing.
So do I and I have a weak jawline. Beards aren't the only way. You need to stop trying to find a problem for every solution and actually start finding a solution for every problem.
Oh yeah?
I’ve been doing jaw exercises for the past few weeks and have started to notice that my neck fat more held in now, which gets me really excited because I’m actually coming to the end of my bulking phase at the gym.
I also have flat feet (and ridiculously tight muscles) which look almost identical to my father’s. In general, walking short distances can be incredibly painful because I would get shin-splints due to where my weight is held by my feet. It has been my biggest insecurity and played a huge role in costing me my first and only ever relationship.
Recently I have been going ham with stretching and therapy. Although I previously have tried for years on end to fix the problem (both private and public health sectors failed), it is now my number 1 priority.
and guess what? Yesterday me and a friend went to London and walked 15km! My arches were almost at the break of collapsing again, but I did it! I’m allowing my feet to relax for today and doing soft stretches, but it’s looking good.
So many people take walking for granted, but for me it has been a serious struggle for the past 8 years.
I’m going to overcome this no matter what, because if I don’t then I will spend the rest of my life living in my own regret of “what if?”.
You just told a story about how your anxiety and insecurity caused you to lose a relationship. But at least you were able to enter a relationship in the first place. Most people here have never been able to even get there.
I fully agree that personality and character are important in maintaining a relationship, but that only matters if you're able to get in a relationship at all.
Looks are a very large part of initial attraction, how you "get your foot in the door" so to speak.
The reason I managed to even enter the relationship was because all I had to do was type to her after I went back to the UK.
I didn’t even see her until 6 months into the ‘relationship’ that was online until then - to which by then her interest had died out. I was so paranoid and stressed that my mind completely kicked off and I temporarily went through a condition known as ‘depersonalisation’ in preparation to seeing her in person for the 1st time since I asked for her skype.
Depersonalisation is like seeing your life in 3rd person, and it was the only reason it became a real relationship; I literally could not feel anxiety because of the condition.
Had my brain not packed in, I’d probably still be a virgin and consider myself an incel.
Despite me being 3 years younger, she said that I had “very little life experience”, which was true. I had spent all my time locked in my room playing video games prior to meeting her.
Only after she broke up with me, did I start drug use which actually lead to me developing the level of self-awareness that I have now.
I don’t regret anything at all. Everything felt like it happened for a reason, so I don’t regret anything.
What, you think they somehow filtered out all the instances where people's looks were halod by their personalities?
The definition of the halo effect speaks of correlation between positive traits. It doesn't even have a general definition that implies that it's looks based.
ha·lo ef·fect
NOUN
the tendency for an impression created in one area to influence opinion in another area.
"the convertible furnishes a sporty image and provides a halo effect for other cars in the showrooms"
See more translations
Halo effect
The halo effect is a cognitive bias in which an observer's overall impression of a person, company, brand, or product influences the observer's feelings and thoughts about that entity's character or properties. It was named by psychologist Edward Thorndike in reference to a person being perceived as having a halo.
Any prominent positive trait AT ALL will lend positive bias toward all other perceived traits.
That's why suddenly countless women think that guys who look like Adam driver are hot:
I find that most "unattractive" men generally aren't conventionally ugly, but just don't present their selves in the best light. First impressions are key for a reason, we all judge people we meet within the first 15 seconds, both on a unconscious and conscious level.
So when you have poor hygiene, dress shoddily, and then act like there is a massive chip on your shoulder. What you are saying to others in non-verbal communication is "STAY AWAY". Women are wired more so than men to pick up on kinesthetic language.
When you are unhappy, desperate, and lack self esteem, it shows through your body language. No one wants to spend time with someone who is constantly caught up in their own problems. It's not up to us to fix you, because the only one who can change your life situation is you. No one wants to be held responsible for fixing someones issues, especially if they refuse to accept their own responsibility in their problems.
I'd say change the I fix you, for please fix me. As a lot of dudes think that getting vag will magically fix their issues. Sure, I may have a nice vagina, but it's no miracle worker.
The idea is that a lot of people here that haven't decided to LDAR have decent jobs, close friends, enjoyable hobbies and skills, good hygiene, etc... but are completely unable for whatever reason (looks, disabilities) to find a woman. The lack of intimate attention in their lives is a glaring issue that can't really be solved with other methods due to the male libido.
You forgot the important part, learn body language!!!!!! You can say a lot more about yourself through your poster, and how to control your kinesthetic communication.
Seriously, learn about it, it will change how you communicate, and alters how people see you, without them being aware of it. I used to have issues with my body language, as I always came off as cold and stand offish. It took me a while to realize that I was sending the wrong signals to people through my body language. As I said before first impressions are key!!!
If you are projecting that you are angry and unhappy, people will go out of their way to avoid you. Positive body language can do a lot to improve how you are seen by others, especially strangers.
youre out of youre league. we know things youre dumbass brain is incapable of understanding. im dead fucking serious, why the fuck do women think they can give men advice about this shit, goddamn.
when you get old and unattractive and the men you used to like ghost you please just follow your own advice and don't complain. all about projecting happiness ;) aka tricking a bitch into thinking youre worth fucking
I find that it's a good exercise for empathy skills, as it's not a situation (being incel) that I understand, so trying to put myself in your guys place does help me to gain perspective.
Kinaesthetic language is, to quote Google: "Kinesthesis, also referred to as kinesthesia, is the perception of body movements. It involves being able to detect changes in body position and movements without relying on information from the five senses."
I find that most "unattractive" men generally aren't conventionally ugly
lol i want to be nice since youre trying to be nice and positive, but on my end its like explaining basic concepts to people too ignorant/blind/dumb to have realized on their own.
the people you're describing as "unattractive" aren't me/us/incels, they're average men which women generally just don't find attractive.
So when you have poor hygiene, dress shoddily, and then act like there is a massive chip on your shoulder. What you are saying to others in non-verbal communication is "STAY AWAY". Women are wired more so than men to pick up on kinesthetic language.
lol not even gonna address this, plenty of us know how to dress. we're literally 10x smarter than you and more aware of social norms conventions and details.... so patronizing.
When you are unhappy, desperate, and lack self esteem, it shows through your body language. No one wants to spend time with someone who is constantly caught up in their own problems. It's not up to us to fix you, because the only one who can change your life situation is you. No one wants to be held responsible for fixing someones issues, especially if they refuse to accept their own responsibility in their problems.
we know. its a self fulfilling prophecy. get bullied for being an incel, lose confidence, they smell the sadness on you and are like 'yuck' -- yeah we fucking know. GTFO
Thank you for not being a total ass, I know that is hard when you are in a depressed head space. However, you really don't know me, my preferences, and so on, but thanks for assuming.
I am married to an ex-incel, and I helped him through his self image and self worth issues. As he was what you would call "below average" and had essentially given up on ever having a woman because of it. Meanwhile, all he needed was to just take care of himself, and love himself, that honestly made him way more attractive to me.
As for the last part you said, I feel for you guys, I don't doubt that being in that head space makes it any better. However as I have learned, just fake it until you believe it. Has worked for me, though I do have the unfair advantage of being a chick with big boobies.
Yeah, he's not my first incel either, my first bf was one, even though we ended the relationship, of 7 years, he did appreciate that I helped to turn him into a better man. Actually, he's doing really well, and is engaged to a wonderful woman, I'm glad that overcame his issues.
Current boyfriend, had sex once, acne, no muscle and bit of a goblin bod, lived with his parents, 5'8, shy and awkward af, and worked a shit job. But I saw something good in him, liked that he was a positive and genuinely good person.
So, I gave him a chance, and you know what, he's been getting fit, lost the acne, we live together, and he has a way better job. He lookmax AFTER we dated, so when I say shit about being positive, and learning how to project it, I mean it. Don't give up hope!!!!!!
In my extremely limited female brain, what I've seen is the issue on my side. The worst being that a lot of Western women have been brainwashed by feminist dogma to see men as the enemy. It's to the point that you get called a creep for just saying hello.
Men are punished these days for being themselves, creating the current culture of men, including the rise of MGTOW and INCEL is part of the feminist agenda, makes it easier to further degrade men when all the negativity is concentrated in one group. The bad apples of these men's groups are then used as an example by feminists, as a way to prove to other women that all men are psychopaths.
This in turn makes nice women become distrustful, and when they have an encounter with a man, that in turn reinforces this cognitive biases.
okay.. but i mean why did you fall in love with 'incel' guys? there are good looking men, theyre more abundant than us and surprise -- they actually do have better personalities and lives than us. ive pretty much never met a girl ugly average or beautiful who when talking about it doesnt seem really really into hot guys or good looking ones. why would you voluntarily choose to date an incel?
thats a distinct question from why are you sympathetic to us?
i agree with you, i feel like feminsts/women dont listen, theyre ready to pull the trigger, and if you say hi just passing on a daily walk or something they look afraid or off put, while a man can nod to say hi to a man. feel villified and unwanted/repulsive my whole life.
but yeah just curious why you saw a love interest where others saw a gross creep
Hmm, good question. I had ugly duckling syndrome, so I got bullied a lot, up till puberty, than I got "hot". Even though I know I'm not unattractive, that shit really gets into your head after years of hearing the same shit.
So, when I try to date a Chad, my walls tend to be up, as they were one of the types to bully me growing up. So, I get way too nervous, paranoid, and just can't relax and be myself. I've had to out right reject these Chads, because of these issues.
Where as while I was growing up, the one group that treated me like a person was these so called "ugly" guys. So I guess I learned to associate them with more positive emotions. That combined with having to constantly listen to female friends bitch about how their Chad was an asshole, kind of reinforced that point.
I just learned to judge people by their actions and intent, and to disregard looks to some degree. Especially superficial shit like muscles, skin, and so on. Looks change, and are easily altered through self care, I've done it, I'm sure anyone can. Because I was an ugly mofo!
To some people that don't understand and think it's about confidence or attitude, these ratings are solely based on profile photos. No text, conversation or actual meeting. This is what we call the halo effect. The more attractive you are, the more open people will be to you and the more positive their initial disposition towards you is.
The halo effect is a form of cognitive bias in which the brain allows specific positive traits to positively influence the overall evaluation of the person, idea, or object in the halo.
The halo effect can also be explained as the behavior (usually unconscious) of using evaluations based on things unrelated, to make judgments about something or someone. The halo effect specifically refers to when this behavior has a positive correlation, such as viewing someone who is attractive is more likely to be seen as successful and more popular. When this judgement has a negative connotation, such as someone unattractive being charged more firmly for a crime than someone attractive, it is referred to as the horn effect.
Maybe talking to them might help, you're asking people to rate personality and looks off a profile. Less attractive people may just be less confident and hence a perceived worse personality. You lot just need to learn you gotta just go for it and not be a pussy
I find that most "unattractive" men generally aren't conventionally ugly
lol i want to be nice since youre trying to be nice and positive, but on my end its like explaining basic concepts to people too ignorant/blind/dumb to have realized on their own.
the people you're describing as "unattractive" aren't me/us/incels, they're average men which women generally just don't find attractive.
So when you have poor hygiene, dress shoddily, and then act like there is a massive chip on your shoulder. What you are saying to others in non-verbal communication is "STAY AWAY". Women are wired more so than men to pick up on kinesthetic language.
lol not even gonna address this, plenty of us know how to dress. we're literally 10x smarter than you and more aware of social norms conventions and details.... so patronizing.
When you are unhappy, desperate, and lack self esteem, it shows through your body language. No one wants to spend time with someone who is constantly caught up in their own problems. It's not up to us to fix you, because the only one who can change your life situation is you. No one wants to be held responsible for fixing someones issues, especially if they refuse to accept their own responsibility in their problems.
we know. its a self fulfilling prophecy. get bullied for being an incel, lose confidence, they smell the sadness on you and are like 'yuck' -- yeah we fucking know. GTFO
66 comments
3 cartersweeney 2018-04-03
They probably do as they've had a life time of being accepted and treated well by others rather than being rejected and left incel by their ugliness thus turning them bitter, twisted and angry...
1 Joemo55 2018-04-03
Yep, bad looks leads to bitterness
1 MyFavoriteDude 2018-04-03
Because people treat you poorly and life is more difficult.
1 StoopidSeksyFlanders 2018-04-03
The girls who treated me the worst where always the uggos. Maybe they where going for an easy target to score points, or maybe they really where shitty people.
1 mangoman30 2018-04-03
T H E B L A C K P I L L I S S P R E A D I N G
1 EvelynnSpoiler 2018-04-03
People with bad looks tend to be more reserved and less open to speaking to others, whereas ‘attractive’ people are more likely to be confident.
It makes sense really.
2 Joemo55 2018-04-03
Agreed. Confidence doesn't come without being attractive
-1 EvelynnSpoiler 2018-04-03
No? I’m fairly decent looking and I’ve even had girls approach me at clubs. My only relationship was with a very attractive girl who I believed was way out of my league - to the extent that I started to try to overcompensate by taking steroids and spending ridiculous amounts of money to visit her multiple times a year (I was studying in another country).
You know what cost me the relationship? I was so fucking insecure. At one point, I was so obsessively paranoid that I blew several thousand bucks on gambling to get the paranoia off my mind - bear in mind I had never touched a drug by that point.
My own anxiety and insecurity cost me a relationship with a girl that turned down guys on a daily basis because she loved me.
The reason she broke up with me was because her father (a policemen) realised that I was restricting her freedom and wasn’t doing stretches that I should’ve been doing every day to deal with the fact that I couldn’t walk 50 yards at times.
I blamed her for everything after she broke it off. I blamed women and I never even considered how undesirable I made myself through my own negative mindset and actions.
I kept believing she deserved better and she did because I treated her as if she did.
So don’t make up nonsense that looks are what gets you a girl. It’s so bullshit.
Anxiety, depression, and a negative philosophy of life are what leave you single for the rest of your life.
There is literally a quadriplegic motivational speaker that has a wife and kids because he made the best out of his circumstances, rather than falling a victim to them and saying, “boo-hoo, I was born this way”.
3 Joemo55 2018-04-03
OMG I get it now! Looks have nothing to do with attraction
1 bengalsturntup5532 2018-04-03
Lol
0 EvelynnSpoiler 2018-04-03
I didn’t say that. But attraction is based on much more than physical appearance. Even fashion sense can be a huge influential factor.
2 Joemo55 2018-04-03
I direct everyone to the same shit. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Halo_effect try missing 13 teeth with an attracious nose being color blind and borderline deaf.
1 HelperBot_ 2018-04-03
Non-Mobile link: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Halo_effect
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1 EvelynnSpoiler 2018-04-03
I had to study the Halo effect in Social Psychology lectures.
Dentures can replace missing teeth aesthetic-wise. You can make your nose appear better by shifting the focus to a different part of your face (such as with a beard or specific glasses that suit you). Color blindness isn’t the be-all and end-all. A really good friend of mine is color blind and he has never mentioned it more than once. Hearing aids can assist with hearing.
There really are solutions to your problems...
1 Joemo55 2018-04-03
Psst... I can't grow a beard. I have gaps
1 EvelynnSpoiler 2018-04-03
So do I and I have a weak jawline. Beards aren't the only way. You need to stop trying to find a problem for every solution and actually start finding a solution for every problem.
1 Joemo55 2018-04-03
There's no solution to genetics. Ur jawline won't change, nor will my facial hair, not will my crooked nose
1 EvelynnSpoiler 2018-04-03
Oh yeah? I’ve been doing jaw exercises for the past few weeks and have started to notice that my neck fat more held in now, which gets me really excited because I’m actually coming to the end of my bulking phase at the gym.
I also have flat feet (and ridiculously tight muscles) which look almost identical to my father’s. In general, walking short distances can be incredibly painful because I would get shin-splints due to where my weight is held by my feet. It has been my biggest insecurity and played a huge role in costing me my first and only ever relationship.
Recently I have been going ham with stretching and therapy. Although I previously have tried for years on end to fix the problem (both private and public health sectors failed), it is now my number 1 priority.
and guess what? Yesterday me and a friend went to London and walked 15km! My arches were almost at the break of collapsing again, but I did it! I’m allowing my feet to relax for today and doing soft stretches, but it’s looking good.
So many people take walking for granted, but for me it has been a serious struggle for the past 8 years.
I’m going to overcome this no matter what, because if I don’t then I will spend the rest of my life living in my own regret of “what if?”.
1 Joemo55 2018-04-03
Keep on walking, man. Chicks dig men who walk
1 EvelynnSpoiler 2018-04-03
bro just don't ever give up on yourself. Seriously, you might not realise how far you can get
1 MyFavoriteDude 2018-04-03
Nobody is debating that, genius. You miss the entire point of the thread and what data it is presenting.
2 kta2 2018-04-03
You just told a story about how your anxiety and insecurity caused you to lose a relationship. But at least you were able to enter a relationship in the first place. Most people here have never been able to even get there.
I fully agree that personality and character are important in maintaining a relationship, but that only matters if you're able to get in a relationship at all.
Looks are a very large part of initial attraction, how you "get your foot in the door" so to speak.
1 EvelynnSpoiler 2018-04-03
The reason I managed to even enter the relationship was because all I had to do was type to her after I went back to the UK.
I didn’t even see her until 6 months into the ‘relationship’ that was online until then - to which by then her interest had died out. I was so paranoid and stressed that my mind completely kicked off and I temporarily went through a condition known as ‘depersonalisation’ in preparation to seeing her in person for the 1st time since I asked for her skype.
Depersonalisation is like seeing your life in 3rd person, and it was the only reason it became a real relationship; I literally could not feel anxiety because of the condition.
Had my brain not packed in, I’d probably still be a virgin and consider myself an incel. Despite me being 3 years younger, she said that I had “very little life experience”, which was true. I had spent all my time locked in my room playing video games prior to meeting her.
Only after she broke up with me, did I start drug use which actually lead to me developing the level of self-awareness that I have now.
I don’t regret anything at all. Everything felt like it happened for a reason, so I don’t regret anything.
1 iQ9k 2018-04-03
Lol
1 superman1145 2018-04-03
Lol 'attractive' I like how IT users like to pretend beauty doesn't exist, everyone is average in their world
1 bengalsturntup5532 2018-04-03
They seem to think their personalities are awesome and everyone on here has a personality of 0
1 justforlulzandkeks 2018-04-03
Lmao, it's literally the other way around. Thanks for the casual black pill tho
1 KV_2018 2018-04-03
This study was entirely based on profile pictures. You cannot accurately gauge someone's confidence through a profile picture.
1 EvelynnSpoiler 2018-04-03
this is also a good point
1 neomancr 2018-04-03
What, you think they somehow filtered out all the instances where people's looks were halod by their personalities?
The definition of the halo effect speaks of correlation between positive traits. It doesn't even have a general definition that implies that it's looks based.
ha·lo ef·fect
NOUN
the tendency for an impression created in one area to influence opinion in another area.
"the convertible furnishes a sporty image and provides a halo effect for other cars in the showrooms"
See more translations
Halo effect
The halo effect is a cognitive bias in which an observer's overall impression of a person, company, brand, or product influences the observer's feelings and thoughts about that entity's character or properties. It was named by psychologist Edward Thorndike in reference to a person being perceived as having a halo.
Any prominent positive trait AT ALL will lend positive bias toward all other perceived traits.
That's why suddenly countless women think that guys who look like Adam driver are hot:
https://www.reddit.com/r/Braincels/comments/86gtst/am_i_incel_this_was_my_photo_id_at_my_last_job/dw57el4
1 TriiSoft 2018-04-03
This sub is great proof of that
1 mult1versum 2018-04-03
Not like that the people in this sub became bitter and angry after they were treated like shit their hole life.
1 lady_baphomet 2018-04-03
I find that most "unattractive" men generally aren't conventionally ugly, but just don't present their selves in the best light. First impressions are key for a reason, we all judge people we meet within the first 15 seconds, both on a unconscious and conscious level.
So when you have poor hygiene, dress shoddily, and then act like there is a massive chip on your shoulder. What you are saying to others in non-verbal communication is "STAY AWAY". Women are wired more so than men to pick up on kinesthetic language.
When you are unhappy, desperate, and lack self esteem, it shows through your body language. No one wants to spend time with someone who is constantly caught up in their own problems. It's not up to us to fix you, because the only one who can change your life situation is you. No one wants to be held responsible for fixing someones issues, especially if they refuse to accept their own responsibility in their problems.
1 Joemo55 2018-04-03
School shooters: "I love u, I can fix u!' me: Has friends, destined for greatness. No girls
2 lady_baphomet 2018-04-03
I'd say change the I fix you, for please fix me. As a lot of dudes think that getting vag will magically fix their issues. Sure, I may have a nice vagina, but it's no miracle worker.
1 Peaches_McGee 2018-04-03
The idea is that a lot of people here that haven't decided to LDAR have decent jobs, close friends, enjoyable hobbies and skills, good hygiene, etc... but are completely unable for whatever reason (looks, disabilities) to find a woman. The lack of intimate attention in their lives is a glaring issue that can't really be solved with other methods due to the male libido.
1 mens-libthrowaway 2018-04-03
They think correctly
1 lady_baphomet 2018-04-03
I laughed at that a little harder than I should. :)
1 Tinykahoona 2018-04-03
"Dude just shower and looksmax, you'll be swimming in pussy"
1 lady_baphomet 2018-04-03
You forgot the important part, learn body language!!!!!! You can say a lot more about yourself through your poster, and how to control your kinesthetic communication.
Seriously, learn about it, it will change how you communicate, and alters how people see you, without them being aware of it. I used to have issues with my body language, as I always came off as cold and stand offish. It took me a while to realize that I was sending the wrong signals to people through my body language. As I said before first impressions are key!!!
If you are projecting that you are angry and unhappy, people will go out of their way to avoid you. Positive body language can do a lot to improve how you are seen by others, especially strangers.
1 atheist_terry_jones 2018-04-03
youre out of youre league. we know things youre dumbass brain is incapable of understanding. im dead fucking serious, why the fuck do women think they can give men advice about this shit, goddamn.
when you get old and unattractive and the men you used to like ghost you please just follow your own advice and don't complain. all about projecting happiness ;) aka tricking a bitch into thinking youre worth fucking
1 lady_baphomet 2018-04-03
First of, lol!
Second, already married, but thank you for your concern. :)
1 atheist_terry_jones 2018-04-03
thanks for trying and caring.
1 lady_baphomet 2018-04-03
I find that it's a good exercise for empathy skills, as it's not a situation (being incel) that I understand, so trying to put myself in your guys place does help me to gain perspective.
1 D_Gandy 2018-04-03
"Kinaesthetic language" wtf
1 lady_baphomet 2018-04-03
AKA body language, https://www.helpguide.org/articles/relationships-communication/nonverbal-communication.htm
1 mens-libthrowaway 2018-04-03
That's not what kinaesthetic means.
1 lady_baphomet 2018-04-03
Sorry, I am a dumb woman. :)
1 atheist_terry_jones 2018-04-03
lol i want to be nice since youre trying to be nice and positive, but on my end its like explaining basic concepts to people too ignorant/blind/dumb to have realized on their own.
the people you're describing as "unattractive" aren't me/us/incels, they're average men which women generally just don't find attractive.
lol not even gonna address this, plenty of us know how to dress. we're literally 10x smarter than you and more aware of social norms conventions and details.... so patronizing.
we know. its a self fulfilling prophecy. get bullied for being an incel, lose confidence, they smell the sadness on you and are like 'yuck' -- yeah we fucking know. GTFO
1 lady_baphomet 2018-04-03
Thank you for not being a total ass, I know that is hard when you are in a depressed head space. However, you really don't know me, my preferences, and so on, but thanks for assuming.
I am married to an ex-incel, and I helped him through his self image and self worth issues. As he was what you would call "below average" and had essentially given up on ever having a woman because of it. Meanwhile, all he needed was to just take care of himself, and love himself, that honestly made him way more attractive to me.
As for the last part you said, I feel for you guys, I don't doubt that being in that head space makes it any better. However as I have learned, just fake it until you believe it. Has worked for me, though I do have the unfair advantage of being a chick with big boobies.
1 atheist_terry_jones 2018-04-03
damn, cant even lie i teared up reading that
1 lady_baphomet 2018-04-03
Yeah, he's not my first incel either, my first bf was one, even though we ended the relationship, of 7 years, he did appreciate that I helped to turn him into a better man. Actually, he's doing really well, and is engaged to a wonderful woman, I'm glad that overcame his issues.
Current boyfriend, had sex once, acne, no muscle and bit of a goblin bod, lived with his parents, 5'8, shy and awkward af, and worked a shit job. But I saw something good in him, liked that he was a positive and genuinely good person.
So, I gave him a chance, and you know what, he's been getting fit, lost the acne, we live together, and he has a way better job. He lookmax AFTER we dated, so when I say shit about being positive, and learning how to project it, I mean it. Don't give up hope!!!!!!
1 CopingManletGymcel1 2018-04-03
I already made the necessary changes that he did without having a girlfriend. It still didn't result in a girlfriend.
1 atheist_terry_jones 2018-04-03
so what do you see/understand most people dont?
1 lady_baphomet 2018-04-03
In my extremely limited female brain, what I've seen is the issue on my side. The worst being that a lot of Western women have been brainwashed by feminist dogma to see men as the enemy. It's to the point that you get called a creep for just saying hello.
Men are punished these days for being themselves, creating the current culture of men, including the rise of MGTOW and INCEL is part of the feminist agenda, makes it easier to further degrade men when all the negativity is concentrated in one group. The bad apples of these men's groups are then used as an example by feminists, as a way to prove to other women that all men are psychopaths.
This in turn makes nice women become distrustful, and when they have an encounter with a man, that in turn reinforces this cognitive biases.
1 atheist_terry_jones 2018-04-03
okay.. but i mean why did you fall in love with 'incel' guys? there are good looking men, theyre more abundant than us and surprise -- they actually do have better personalities and lives than us. ive pretty much never met a girl ugly average or beautiful who when talking about it doesnt seem really really into hot guys or good looking ones. why would you voluntarily choose to date an incel?
thats a distinct question from why are you sympathetic to us?
i agree with you, i feel like feminsts/women dont listen, theyre ready to pull the trigger, and if you say hi just passing on a daily walk or something they look afraid or off put, while a man can nod to say hi to a man. feel villified and unwanted/repulsive my whole life.
but yeah just curious why you saw a love interest where others saw a gross creep
1 lady_baphomet 2018-04-03
Hmm, good question. I had ugly duckling syndrome, so I got bullied a lot, up till puberty, than I got "hot". Even though I know I'm not unattractive, that shit really gets into your head after years of hearing the same shit.
So, when I try to date a Chad, my walls tend to be up, as they were one of the types to bully me growing up. So, I get way too nervous, paranoid, and just can't relax and be myself. I've had to out right reject these Chads, because of these issues.
Where as while I was growing up, the one group that treated me like a person was these so called "ugly" guys. So I guess I learned to associate them with more positive emotions. That combined with having to constantly listen to female friends bitch about how their Chad was an asshole, kind of reinforced that point.
I just learned to judge people by their actions and intent, and to disregard looks to some degree. Especially superficial shit like muscles, skin, and so on. Looks change, and are easily altered through self care, I've done it, I'm sure anyone can. Because I was an ugly mofo!
1 SlashSero 2018-04-03
To some people that don't understand and think it's about confidence or attitude, these ratings are solely based on profile photos. No text, conversation or actual meeting. This is what we call the halo effect. The more attractive you are, the more open people will be to you and the more positive their initial disposition towards you is.
1 WikiTextBot 2018-04-03
Halo effect
The halo effect is a form of cognitive bias in which the brain allows specific positive traits to positively influence the overall evaluation of the person, idea, or object in the halo.
The halo effect can also be explained as the behavior (usually unconscious) of using evaluations based on things unrelated, to make judgments about something or someone. The halo effect specifically refers to when this behavior has a positive correlation, such as viewing someone who is attractive is more likely to be seen as successful and more popular. When this judgement has a negative connotation, such as someone unattractive being charged more firmly for a crime than someone attractive, it is referred to as the horn effect.
[ PM | Exclude me | Exclude from subreddit | FAQ / Information | Source ] Downvote to remove | v0.28
1 HiImCoolCool 2018-04-03
Good bot
1 GoodBot_BadBot 2018-04-03
Thank you, HiImCoolCool, for voting on WikiTextBot.
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1 RedLightIsTight 2018-04-03
I’ll fuck your mother
1 Shazig 2018-04-03
Women are scum
1 LooksMatterToWomen 2018-04-03
Bad looks or short stature is "reason" aplenty in their minds.
1 Mr_Charisma_ 2018-04-03
Maybe talking to them might help, you're asking people to rate personality and looks off a profile. Less attractive people may just be less confident and hence a perceived worse personality. You lot just need to learn you gotta just go for it and not be a pussy
1 fktiode 2018-04-03
The scores weren't given only by women. The truth is that pretty much everyone is shallow.
1 NorINorAnyMan 2018-04-03
I didn't need the graph. This subreddit is proof enough on its own that good personalities are highly correlated with looks.
1 Joemo55 2018-04-03
School shooters: "I love u, I can fix u!' me: Has friends, destined for greatness. No girls
1 Tinykahoona 2018-04-03
"Dude just shower and looksmax, you'll be swimming in pussy"
1 D_Gandy 2018-04-03
"Kinaesthetic language" wtf
1 atheist_terry_jones 2018-04-03
lol i want to be nice since youre trying to be nice and positive, but on my end its like explaining basic concepts to people too ignorant/blind/dumb to have realized on their own.
the people you're describing as "unattractive" aren't me/us/incels, they're average men which women generally just don't find attractive.
lol not even gonna address this, plenty of us know how to dress. we're literally 10x smarter than you and more aware of social norms conventions and details.... so patronizing.
we know. its a self fulfilling prophecy. get bullied for being an incel, lose confidence, they smell the sadness on you and are like 'yuck' -- yeah we fucking know. GTFO
1 HiImCoolCool 2018-04-03
Good bot
1 mens-libthrowaway 2018-04-03
That's not what kinaesthetic means.