If people in here weren't racist or sexist, you wouldn't be labelled as that. If, as a community, you don't like those labels, then you should proactively remove people who say those things.

I am racist, sexist and worse. OP isn't. But I suppose that's too hard for a normal to understand.

He said please stop labeling "us". I'm saying it's easy for everyone in here to get labelled that way because of some people.

Yes, we know you have difficulty with nuance. It's easier for your brainlet to assume that everyone is the same, much less thinking that way.

I love hearing about Chad roping

I hate women so fucking much.

Your posts are contributing to my anger. Every time I read one of your criticisms of females I get a little bit more hateful towards the worst half of our population

Older females shouldn't be allowed to access the internet beyond facebook

All of these are by you. It's kind of hard taking the "incels aren't a racist, sexist group" when most of you are like this, and try to push these ideas on the rest.

At the end of the day, a group's a group. Any group that anyone can claim to be from and is big enough will have outliers, but in the end, it doesn't change what the group is, because they're just that, outliers. If tomorrow I join a nazi website, or party, or whatever without being racist, it doesn't unmake the nazis racist.

It's even harder to take the claim seriously when very obviously misogynistic or racist texts ( Or worse, like telling people to kill themselves, even if not meant as an incelt ) just stay there, unmoderated.

Godwins fucking law.

Having reached the Godwin point doesn't make me wrong, in fact, I didn't reach it, because I didn't compare incels to nazis, I merely used it as an example that one member can't absolve the group from a flaw.

I could use another group ( And another flaw ) without any loss of sense, it's not a comparison.

Still trying to justify shitting on all people here for the actions of some.

Then again, nothing new from an IT user here for schadenfreude.

Alright, so, first, you're part of the sexist crowd.

Second, let's say you're not sexist...Why are you here, when almost anything referring to women will be ?

What's the point, what's the purpose behind being part of a group you don't agree with ?

part of the sexist crowd

By being a normie who doesn't agree with the sexism. Makes sense.

why are you here

Former non hateful incel trying to defend those outliers from being unjustly shat upon.

what's the point of being a group you don't agree with

I agree with the parts about looks mattering most (due to my lived experiences), I don't agree with the hate.

Meanwhile, you're here for kicks.

Thanks for assuming my beliefs for me.

No, simply thought you were the first guy I had talked to, my bad.

Former non hateful incel, now normie, trying to defend those outliers from being unjustly shat upon by folks like you.

Yeah, but those outliers, why are they here ? And don't tell me they're doing the same thing as you, because that would be very circular.

I agree with the parts about looks mattering most (due to my lived experiences), I don't agree with the hate and the stupid shit.

Except talking to incels, they don't think looks matter the most, they think only looks matter.

In the end, you're more different than alike regarding incels, which again, begs the question of why one of those outliers would be here in the first place.

Meanwhile, you're here for kicks, so what's your point?

If someone makes themselves laughable, why complain they're getting laughed at ? I won't dox them, I won't insult them - again, when I say incels, talking about the group, not "every singular incel" - so I quite don't see the problem with that, especially when I'm not infiltrating incels.me or anything, I'm literally just browsing a public subreddit.

why are they here

Because they want a venting spot for being chronically rejected, lonely and unloved.

That looks only matter

And in some sense, because of my lived experiences, I agree. (It's more nuanced, obviously, but it has a point).

begs the question of why they're here

Is it so hard to believe that social rejects want a place to belong?

why complain when they're getting laughed at

Because from what I've seen of you, you shit on the outliers all the same without bothering to make the distinction, throwing them under the bus while fueling the hateful ones fires because of some sense of personal entertainment.

Because they want a venting spot for being chronically rejected, lonely and unloved.

Is it so hard to believe that social rejects want a place to belong?

No, that explains why they want a place to do that. It doesn't explain why they pick that one. If you enter a community and see it's populated with sexist, quite often racist, posts, who will put you down before helping you, why don't you bail out ?

I can see the point of venting out, but venting out doesn't require you to come here. And if they're misguided, then instead of shielding them from the very obvious signs of their errors, expose them to that fact.

No incel is gaining anything from being on this sub' except for venting, and, again, venting doesn't take being on r/braincels.

Because from what I've seen of you, you shit on the outliers all the same without bothering to make the distinction, throwing them under the bus while fueling the hateful ones fires because of some sense of personal entertainment.

If that's how it comes off, sad. They should still take the hint that they're being part of a community that is sexist, and much more, as a community, and that people aren't randomly accused of that.

Mind you, why do you try to keep those people here by shielding them from criticism, instead of making your own "good incels" subreddit ? Wouldn't that be much more productive, especially since it'd rely on cooperation ( with your outlier incels ) instead of opposition with those bashing them ?

Hell, many seem to hate one of the mod's, so you'd even get traction going from there, though I'll concede people offended by the idea of a female mod' might not exactly fit your definition of outliers.

You blame people for keeping the fire going, but in the end, you don't really try to put it out, you just heal a few burns, which will inevitably come back. And I'm not saying you're doing that in a malicious way, I'm just saying it comes off as a useless effort.

No, that explains why they want a place to do that. It doesn't explain why they pick that one. If you enter a community and see it's populated with sexist, quite often racist, posts, who will put you down before helping you, why don't you bail out ?

Incelswithouthate is a thing too, and the outliers I'm talking about are both here and on there. The problem is that Braincels is simply more active (In part thanks to the folks from the outside), so people stay here.

I can see the point of venting out, but venting out doesn't require you to come here. And if they're misguided, then instead of shielding them from the very obvious signs of their errors, expose them to that fact.

I'm saying that just shitting on incels as a group instead of taking the individuals by what they themselves say is fucking lazy and doesn't add anything to the conversation. Fuck the hateful shit, but goddamn chill the fuck out on the generalizations.

No incel is gaining anything from being on this sub' except for venting, and, again, venting doesn't take being on r/braincels.

I disagree. Having been in somewhat of the same spot, this place and the people I talked to offered a sense of "support", as in giving me a place to vent and discuss, I just stopped engaging with the hateful shit a while ago.

If that's how it comes off, sad. They should still take the hint that they're being part of a community that is sexist, and much more, as a community, and that people aren't randomly accused of that.

No shit. However, from what I've seen these outliers are still shat upon despite not engaging in the supposed hate they're being shat upon for.

Mind you, why do you try to keep those people here by shielding them from criticism, instead of making your own "good incels" subreddit ? Wouldn't that be much more productive, especially since it'd rely on cooperation ( with your outlier incels ) instead of opposition with those bashing them ?

Repeat the point about Incelswithouthate. I try to shield those specific users from criticism because the accusations being made against them are bullshit (like this post mentions).

Hell, many seem to hate one of the mod's, so you'd even get traction going from there, though I'll concede people offended by the idea of a female mod' might not exactly fit your definition of outliers.

Eh, the users I've talked to that I can consider more reasonable don't seem to give a shit about Board. Neither do I really when it comes to her modding, at least.

You blame people for keeping the fire going, but in the end, you don't really try to put it out, you just heal a few burns, which will inevitably come back. And I'm not saying you're doing that in a malicious way, I'm just saying it comes off as a useless effort.

The "fire" is the toxic cycle of bullshit that is both sides flinging shit at each other because the hateful jackasses enjoy the attention and folks from the outside want their shits and giggles. I've tried working against that before, and it is a useless effort because both sides are getting their rocks off, but I can still try to stop people from backing the bus over the good folks that I've encountered because of said personal entertainment, or self-righteousness or whatever drives them.

Mind you, why do you try to keep those people here by shielding them from criticism, instead of making your own "good incels" subreddit ?

Such subreddits inevitably end up dead. Nobody cares about people who are just lonely, being associated with extremists is what gets people to want to talk to you.

Nobody cares about people who are just lonely (case in point: /r/lonely), being associated with extremists is what gets people to want to talk to you.

Rarely in a positive way though. How much discussion of actual issues impacting incels goes on here when compared to the vast amount of shitposting and flame-bait? I could make a thread right now about being lonely and half the responses would be LDAR/rope/it's OVER!

Rarely in a positive way though.

Hence the least of two evils for you to deny trolls attention and just leave us all to our own devices. Every one of us is people with their own minds. We know how to make decisions.

VonMagnar the normie destroyer <3

You’re nazi group example is really quite a terrible one because here’s the thing, naziism is an idealogy. Thus it’s entirely reasonable to expect a great deal of ideological uniformity in a nazi group because it’s trivially obvious to point out that a person is exceedingly unlikely to join a nazi group without subscribing to the tenets of naziism.

Belonging to an incel group however implies no such ideological uniformity because being an incel isnt an ideological position. It’s more of a state of being. The only thing that being an incel implies is exactly what the name (involuntary celibate) suggests, namely, the inability to acquire romantic and/or sexual relationships in spite of the desire to do so. The only position you could reasonably assume an individual identifying as an incel to hold is the position that being in such a state sucks.

Moreover, you have to realize that you’re claim that you’re justified in generalizing all incels on the basis of the most extreme members cuts both ways. If it is justifiable for you to assume that all members are represented by the most extreme subset of the group, then that would mean that, in fact, those extreme positions are equally justifiable in spite of the fact that they are based in your opinion on the behavior of subsets of populations (ie. “All women are whores), thus negating your original point that those views and the individuals expressing them, not to mention the entirety of the group containing those individuals, ought to be maligned.

We do. We downvote, ignore and report them if they're breaking rules. It's normies like you who give then the attention they want by replying to them

That's not even slightly true. I could open any post on here and see abusive language, derogatory comments, foul language, racial hatred, sexism, and many other things. Literally any post, and lots of people agreeing.

No one cares in the slightest what beliefs you guys have. No one thinks you're weird for not being in a relationship. Everyone has an opinion on this sub, and ones before it, simply because of the language being used in posts.

What do you know? You've been here for a day.

Those posts get usually 4-8 responses at most, except when it gets posted on inceltears or a normie comes in. That's when it blows up, because people like you couldn't just let it be.

I've been reading things in here for weeks. You know it's true. And I see a post that's incredibly abusive, angry and offensive and let's just say it doesn't get much response, the same poster will post something else later on, so it's clear to see that people aren't being warned or banned.

If it's not against the rules, then why would it need to be banned?

Abusive, threatening, sexist, offensive, racist language should be against the rules.

Derogatory comments about white women with Indian men, calling people whores or sluts, people openly encouraging others to kill themselves - I have no idea how any of that stuff isn't against the rules!

Well, it's not. If you disagree with that, talk to the head mod about it or leave.

Meanwhile, I don't really care about what you think should or shouldn't be against the rules if you've only been here for a day.

That's my point. This sub allows that sort of language, which the majority of society would deem offensive and inappropriate so you can't be surprised to learn what people's perception of this sub, and others like it, are.

A significant amount of those people are straight up trolls, another amount are incels using it because dumbass normies give them the attention. Once they stop, then we can move on.

Btw, stuff like "Tyrone" and "currycel" is hardly racist.

It's a little bit racist. And in one of the new posts, there's a big rant where the n word is used a lot and in fact, the entire rant is incredibly offensive, racist and sexist, and nothing ever gets done about it. Can't people make their points and have discussions without resorting to name calling?

What post is that?

I think it might have been removed, it was quite a long rant with no grammar so it might have been deleted to be tidied up. But it really wouldn't take me long to find any post in this sub and send you 10+ examples of just unacceptable language and behaviour, and the worst thing, it gets encouraged by others.

Depends on what you think is actually racist, like I said, "ricecel", "currycel" isn't really racist. Those threads barely get any activity either.

Well, the n word for a start. Like I said, within a 24 hr period of new posts on here, I could copy and paste out 10 examples and reply in here to you.

People don't mind your views. It's just how some people express them

Please do, actually. I can usually tell who's trolling and who's not.

OK give me 24 hours and I'll be back here

ever gets done about it. Can't people make their points and have discussions without resorting to name calling?

Tell that to the mods then. They don't even listen to the incel regulars.

We downvote, ignore and report them if they're breaking rules.

But a lot of the stuff that gets the community a bad name isn't against the rules, so how is that helping?

It's not, like I said they get the attention they want because of normies responding to weak bait and posting it on inceltears, they're at fault too.

Sure, sure, that's a factor. Attention is oxygen for trolls. Obvious bait-threads aside though, a lot of really disturbing views are parroted in the comments too and rarely get the same IT attention a thread would.

And those thread barely gets any activity.

Obvious bait-threads aside though, a lot of really disturbing views are parroted in the comments too and rarely get the same IT attention a thread would.

Name any view that is constantly parroted here outside of troll threads.

Looks are all that matters.

Being a virgin at 20 is the end of your life.

Women always cheat.

Holding ridiculous opinions about women doesn't impact on your ability to interact with women.

Certain ethnic groups and subgroups are inherently disadvantaged compared to one another, though nobody ever agrees who has the upper hand.

Looks influence how people treat you - that's an absolute truth of life, how's this disturbing?

Virgin at 20 it's over - I didn't actually see anyone say that either unironically or non-dramatically but it's probably my bias.

Women always cheat - well, it's stupid but it's not disturbing. A lot of women do cheat given the opportunity it seems (I don't claim that it's the absolute truth, it's my flawed personal perspective).

Holding ridiculous opinions - no, it doesn't. Manipulators, misogynistic men get relationships all the time.

Racism is real.

Looks influence how people treat you - that's an absolute truth of life, how's this disturbing?

That is not what I said.

Virgin at 20 it's over - I didn't actually see anyone say that either unironically or non-dramatically but it's probably my bias.

When I respond to tell people I was a virgin at 20 and my life isn't over, I usually get a very hostile reaction and downvotes. That could just be my bias in play though.

Women always cheat - well, it's stupid but it's not disturbing. A lot of women do cheat given the opportunity it seems (I don't claim that it's the absolute truth, it's my flawed personal perspective).

And so do a lot of men. Rates are roughly equal, apparently, between the genders and yet I never see posters here putting the blame anywhere but on women.

Holding ridiculous opinions - no, it doesn't. Manipulators, misogynistic men get relationships all the time.

Yes, and their opinions and attitudes influence their relationships. If they view women as lesser beings then they're not going to treat them as such beyond maybe a honeymoon phase.

Racism is real.

Fine, I should have contextualised - when it comes to attracting women of any ethnic background, someone will argue that black/Indian/Asian/white men are getting the shitty end of the stick while the others make out like bandits.

That is not what I said.

What did you say then?

And so do a lot of men. Rates are roughly equal, apparently, between the genders and yet I never see posters here putting the blame anywhere but on women.

Some (those who do that unironically) blame the archetypical Chad or do you not see the widespread usage of the word "cuck"? It's not just an emasculating insult

Yes, and their opinions and attitudes influence their relationships. If they view women as lesser beings then they're not going to treat them as such beyond maybe a honeymoon phase.

If they have looks to override it, this can be negated for the longest time. I've seen that myself. Besides, for all the talk of incels being creeps, actual creeps are very good chameleons and are very good with reconditioning to the point that women that entered relationships with such people might intellectually understand but still don't leave them.

when it comes to attracting women of any ethnic background, someone will argue that black/Indian/Asian/white men are getting the shitty end of the stick while the others make out like bandits.

That one is a twisting interpretation of posters' surroundings. In certain groups, there are certainly certain sexual preferences.

What did you say then?

"Looks are all that matters"

Some (those who do that unironically) blame the archetypical Chad or do you not see the widespread usage of the word "cuck"? It's not just an emasculating insult

See, the issue with this is that Chad isn't getting the blame. The (supposedly) cheating woman is a typical roastie whore, and the cheated-on man is demeaningly called a cuck, but there's never any reflection on the fact that in this scenario the cuck is a victim and Chad is the bad guy; instead it's treated as normal, acceptable behavior for Chad and the cucked guy is treated with contempt for, what, being so stupid as to trust a woman?

Besides, for all the talk of incels being creeps, actual creeps are very good chameleons and are very good with reconditioning to the point that women that entered relationships with such people might intellectually understand but still don't leave them.

I don't disagree, but it doesn't refute my point. Their behavior is influenced by the way they view women.

That one is a twisting interpretation of posters' surroundings. In certain groups, there are certainly certain sexual preferences.

I'm aware of that, but the claims are usually that all women of all ethnic backgrounds exclusively want men of a certain race. That goes far beyond preference.

Looks are all that matters

If you don't have the looks to get you through the door then no one but your family and friends will care about your personality traits.

See, the issue with this is that Chad isn't getting the blame.

I kinda saw threads that suggest otherwise but that's again, my bias.

I don't disagree, but it doesn't refute my point. Their behavior is influenced by the way they view women.

Whose?

If you don't have the looks to get you through the door then no one but your family and friends will care about your personality traits.

Perhaps, but obviously we disagree on the level of looks required to "get through the door".

I kinda saw threads that suggest otherwise but that's again, my bias.

Could you point me to some? Because most of the time it seems to me like Chad is envied and admired rather than resented.

Whose?

The "actual creeps" in your example.

Could you point me to some? Because most of the time it seems to me like Chad is envied and admired rather than resented.

I'll try to keep that in mind, right now, unfortunately, I cannot.

I'd appreciate that.

But a lot of the stuff that gets the community a bad name isn't against the rules, so how is that helping?

Bring that attention to the mods then.

And say what? "I'm a visitor to your lovely sub, but I'd appreciate if you'd crack down on your members' propensity for batshit insanity"? Clearly they know about it and they don't care to stop people, so my opinion is unlikely to be given any particular attention.

Clearly they know about it and they don't care to stop people, so my opinion is unlikely to be given any particular attention.

That's the point I was going to get at. They don't listen to anybody and they clearly let enough bullcrap fly.

So don't expect our complaints to do anything. We were even lucky they decided cracking down on the race baiting posts.

Oh, I getcha. Though even the wording of that one is strange - it's low-quality race bait that's against the rules, as if you could post some really well-made race bait and it would be allowed.

I'm perfectly fine being an 18 year old virgin even if it does make me a loser.

It doesn't. I don't expect me saying so to change anyone's mind, but I feel like it needs to be reiterated that being a virgin at 18 is not that uncommon, and you're not a loser just because you haven't had sex yet.

Sounds like you've got some really easy changes that you can make in your life then

Well it sounds like you either push yourself to make changes and see what happens or you just stay as you are. If you're not happy with how you are, then it sounds like trying to make some changes has no downside.

If you make changes, whatever they are, how can things get worse? Sounds like the worst thing is getting rejected which has already happened so there's no downside

It's not entirely socially acceptable to just approach strangers. You need to find an excuse, such as a shared instead group, even a Facebook group where you can chat to people and progress it to offline, or even in supermarkets where you can say hi to checkout staff etc. The creepiest thing is when guys start conversations blatantly for one reason. Just need to say hello and chat in a friendly way. Don't even ask for a number or anything, just a 1 min chat, say hello, and then whatever is naturally appropriate in that situation and then leave it. That'll build up confidence and "chat skills".

18 year olds don't use Facebook? That seems unlikely.

Those questions like hello only really have one response, which is hello back. Can I help you with that normally has a no response. You could ask a few more open ended questions, or even "it's pretty hot today isn't it" which is a casual non flirty thing to say and could get a response back of yeah it is, I got pretty tired walking here, and you can then respond with something and it turns into a little 1min chat where the other person knows you're friendly, chatty and non creepy.

You sure have a shitload of excuses for not attempting to make any kind of effort.

Stop making excuses.

One thing that TRULY DOESNT WORK is self ridicule. Why should anyone feel bad for you when you already feel bad enough for yoursel? People don't gravitate towards people who act like this. They just don't. It's a lot to deal with for another person too, to deal with the whining and pouting about stuff you can truly control if you DECIDED to. Read some self improvement books, life hacks, or anything. YouTube helps too. Just don't sit there complaining about your life. It helps to remember that SOMEONE always has it worse than you. Your problems are small in the true scope of life and if you can't handle your problems in high school, then you have SO MUCH more to worry about in life than involuntary celebacy.

Or he can kill himself.

It is uncommon for girls since most of them lose their virginity at 14, but yeah it is pretty common for guys to be virgins at 18.

It is uncommon for girls since most of them lose their virginity at 14

What part of the world is this? The global average age is 19 IIRC.

England, lol. All of the girls in my class stated that they lost their virginity around 14-15, while all of the boys were aged 18 and were still virgins.

England, lo

That's where I am too! Our national average age for both men and women is around 18/18.5 years :-P

All of the girls in my class stated that they lost their virginity around 14-15, while all of the boys were aged 18 and were still virgins.

Whereas all the boys in my class claimed to have had sex by the time they were 14, but many of them would privately admit to lying about it so as not to be the target of ridicule from other boys. It's an incredibly common thing for kids to lie about, so anecdotal evidence "proving" either side isn't that useful here.

Yes, except that women have no reason to lie about their virginity because it isn't tied to their status as much as it is for males. Also all the girls had boyfriends so they most likely weren't virgins, (the males in my class were all single and never had gfs as far as I'm aware). Btw the national average in UK is actually around 17 years.

Yes, except that women have no reason to lie about their virginity because it isn't tied to their status as much as it is for males.

I'd argue that it absolutely is. Perhaps even more so. How often do you see the same old "roastie" comments about how women who've had multiple sex partners are whores? How often do you see girls being called sluts, slags, easy etc? Women get as much shit for having sex as men do for not having sex, which is insane when you think about it.

Btw the national average in UK is actually around 17 years.

That's from a 2002 study though - a Durex study done in 2016 gives the average as 18 years and 4 months, so evidently in the intervening 14 years we as a nation got more comfortable with waiting :-P

If having sex with men is so damaging to women then why would they tell everyone that they lost their virginity at 14? Wouldn't they lie about still being virgins instead?

It's a double-edged sword. Too much sex, you're a whore. Not enough sex, you're frigid. In the case of your classmates it's possible they had all lost their virginity and didn't care to lie about it, it's possible some of them were lying to fit in and not be ostracised, etc etc. It's a delicate minefield to navigate, and for the most part kids want to fit in with their peers.

It's a delicate minefield to navigate, and for the most part kids want to fit in with their peers.

Which means that sex usually happens sooner than the official statistics suggest.

How do you draw that conclusion? It could equally be said that sex usually happens later than statistics tell us.

Occam's Razor: teens are experiencing significant raises in hormone levels. There is a significant level of teenage pregnancies in the UK. What is more likely - early sex or late sex?

The level of teenage pregnancy here is the lowest it's been since we started to track it back in the 60's, so I'm not sure that's a completely valid basis for an argument.

25% of the female adolescent population is still high and if anything, it reflects that the teens became more careful but still have a shitton of sex.

25% of the female adolescent population is still high

Compared to what? It's not wildly out of line with the rest of the world, as far as I can see.

if anything, it reflects that the teens became more careful but still have a shitton of sex.

It might, or it might not. There's no basis for that conclusion one way or the other.

Compared to what? It's not wildly out of line with the rest of the world, as far as I can see.

Compared to the rest of Europe.

It might, or it might not. There's no basis for that conclusion one way or the other.

Can you explain your reasoning?

Compared to the rest of Europe.

European average is 6 per 1,000, UK rate is 6.8 per 1,000. We're way higher than a lot of Western Europe, true, but AFAIK we also have worse sex ed etc than them.

Can you explain your reasoning?

OK, so, we know teen pregnancy is down. Statistics say people are losing their virginity later. Those two factors would seem to agree with one another, right?

What you're suggesting is that the first statistic is correct but the second is erroneous, but you're not really explaining why since your original argument was based on high rates of teen pregnancy compared to other nations. It's not really a fair comparison though, as we know our teen pregnancy rate is declining regardless of its relation to other nations'. None of this information leads us to the conclusion that teens are having lots and lots of sex with effective contraception, though obviously we can't rule it out, and so it's not a great basis for the supposition.

None of this information leads us to the conclusion that teens are having lots and lots of sex with effective contraception, though obviously we can't rule it out, and so it's not a great basis for the supposition.

Because I see the example of Australia, which shares the same cultural space as you guys and also experienced a drastic decrease in teenage pregnancies but their health authorities openly state that the decrease in teenage pregnancies doesn't suggest the decrease in sexual activity but rather effective contraception measures.

But that's ignoring the rest of the statistics regarding age of virginity loss. I don't know What the stats are for Australia, but in this case we have people reporting becoming sexually active later in life and a reduction in term pregnancies, two statistics which would logically support one another

So what you are saying is 14 year olds always have sex with 18 year olds? Come on now.

I never said that, Cathy Newman.

That's exactly what you implied. Or are you saying that women (that "all" have sex at 14) start having sex with other women and only start fucking guys when they turn 18?

Because that's the only other way for your statement to be possible.

Lol 14 year olds could have sex with 20 year olds for all I care.

In the US, the average age to lose virginity for both guys and girls is 17. Other countries may be different, but plenty of people here don't have sex until early-mid twenties.

Plenty is irrelevant when it is put as a percentage, iirc only around 5-10% of the population loses it in their mid twenties, and even when they do theyll still be outliers because they were unable to get something most people get in their teen years due to their ugly looks and/or poor social skills.

The CDC... reports that virgins make up 12.3 percent of females and 14.3 percent of males aged 20 to 24. That number drops below 5 percent for both male and female virgins aged 25 to 29 and goes as low as 0.3 percent for virgins aged 40 to 44. (Article)

Plenty of people wait to have sex until college or later, and that doesn't necessarily mean something's wrong with them. Some people are more reserved, conservative, or just not ready yet. Same article:

A University of Texas at Austin study showed that survey respondents who lost their virginities at 20 or older reported having more satisfying romantic relationships than respondents who lost their virginities younger than 20.

Waiting 'til you're a bit more mature can be a good thing.

Or it might be because they have no social skills? I seriously doubt that 15% of men CHOOSE to be virgins.

Lol but when I say I'm 18 and virgin you make fun of me for it.

SAD!

Lol but when I say I'm 18 and virgin you make fun of me for it.

When did I do that?

at least I have sex lol have fun being incel

That doesn't answer my question at all, that's just you typing some random shit and pretending I said it. Where exactly did I make fun of you for being a virgin at 18? Why would I do that when I was a virgin at 18 myself?

Well if you can get laid then the personality myth can finally be put to rest.

OK, that one was pretty good, kudos :-P

I'd be happy to talk to you if you'd like a friend

u can't pussy worship?fuck u bitch

About half of American adolescents are virgins at 18. Don't believe that everyone around you is fucking like mad. They aren't.

It's also pretty normal to feel isolated and lonely in high school. Some people are obviously at the top of their game in high school... but trust me, you don't want to be someone who peaks at that point.

Odds are, things will start getting better for you quickly in a new environment, especially since you seem to have avoided the trap of hate and resentment. Good luck!

I had a good friend in HS that was ugly and fat. He had friends that were girls, but never a girl friend. Now he's ugly, fat, and happily married. Things change a lot after HS.

Fat people are volcel

I'm perfectly fine being an 18 year old virgin even if it does make me a loser.

Definitely does not make you a loser. I know a lot of guys that didn't lose their virginity until later in life and have very fulfilling romantic lives.

I'm very happy high school is nearly over, for 4 years I just existed as a ghost and attempted suicide twice.

I'm sorry to hear that. You're going to look back at high school when you are older and realize that it was such a small part of your life.

I feel like I don't have a future and it's time to give up.

I wouldn't be too worried about that, it'll take a while to figure out what you want out of life and it will be fine.

I don't hate anybody but myself, so please stop labelling us as a group of racists and sexists.

As long as you don't express hatred towards anyone else, no one will think you're racist and sexist :)

I would recommend talking to a therapist. I think it will be really helpful.

That's a good thing mate, I'm full of rage and hatred and it literally destroys me on the inside. There's no point holding onto hate, It only harms yourself, but it's also hard to let go of it.

Just because you are not a cunt, does not mean that other incels are not cunts. If you don't want to be associated with racism and sexism, don't associate yourself with racists and sexists.

Just because you've labelled every male virgin (AKA incel) as racist/sexist, doesn't mean we are. Fuck. Off.

Nope. I've labelled incels as such because they are as such. You're pretty heavily censored here, elsewhere on the web - not so much. And I've seen what people like you post when you think you're not being watched.

Wow that's really bigoted. The only thing that binds "incels" is the fact they're male virgins. If you actually think every male virgin is a sexist/racist or whatever then honestly I'm just going to block you because you're either trolling or you're just a really sad bigoted POS. Bye bye.

I've got no problem with male virgins. I'm friends with quite a few, whether they know that I know or not. I only have a problem with people who call themselves incels, because I've seen the morals and ideals your community pushes. I've seen the dehumanising language you use both for yourselves and other people, and I'm not ok with either. I've seen the racist BBC theory and I've seen the blatantly sexist AFBB theories.

Incels do not belong on this earth. Guys who just can't get laid, I have no problem with.

Incel means involuntarily celibate. That's it. I don't discriminate against anyone or hate anyone. There are lots of other people like me here. it's just no one gives a shit about the normal people here and their faces go red when they see anyone being hateful and they assume we're all like that. I understand why you wouln't like a lot of incels but there's no reason to think we don't belong on this earth.

Yup, and the idea that you are somehow entitled to sex as implied by the name is one of my major issues. A virgin, who can not get laid, calls themselves a virgin. A virgin, who can not get laid and has somebody to blame, calls themselves an incel.

I have friends who are virgins. I do not have friends that are incels. We have one guy locally who defines himself as such, and I've had to physically pry him off of my friends on multiple occasions.

and the idea that you are somehow entitled to sex as implied by the name is one of my major issues.

does it? I've never thought that before. How does it imply an that an incel believes he deserves sex?

Because nobody is forcing you to be celibate. But you act like they are, as if there's some big evil conspiracy to keep you single instead of your own faults.

If your own faults include looking deformed then I agree.

Looking like shit is no excuse. Might make it harder, but there's a blind chick floating around somewhere near you who doesn't give a shit about looks. Go find her.

Even stevie wonder had beauty standards. If you actually believe it's reasonable for a man to search for a blind woman his entire life to find love we're done talking m8.

It was an example, not a guide.

Take me as an example. I don't look for looks in a partner. I look for somebody who understands my ASD well enough that I can be comfortable sharing my home-time with them. Everything else is secondary.

I don't look for looks in a partner.

This is very difficult to relate to which makes me think you're lying but I'll take your word for it.

Its a question of priorities. I dope myself pretty heavily to cope with my sensory issues, but I also do it because it slows me down, stops my excessive talking and makes me more generally personable.

I hate being high 24/7. The less I need to smoke to get through my day, the happier I am. Because despite pot being a relatively mild drug in terms of side effects, the ungodly amount I smoke (Somewhere between 1/2oz to an oz a week) has some potent downsides. So if I'm going to date, I have to date somebody who gets me. Who is unlikely to twig my sensory issues and who is unlikely to take offense or take advantage of the way my mind works. A pretty face means nothing to me if I can't enjoy the company.

Looks tend to function as a tie breaker. All else being equal, the pretty face wins. If you focus on being your best self, something you do have control over, people will be more inclined to see you for who you are instead of what you are.

i appreciate the comment. You seem like a sensible person. All I can ask from you is not to immediately judge everyone here as scum until they prove it themselves. Have a good rest of your day bro.

I'm perfectly fine being an 18 year old virgin even if it does make me a loser.

That doesn't make you a loser. It's pretty standard, actually.

only 18

Gtfo

Stfu

It doesn't make you a loser lol.

As for your message about not hating women. That belief is largely focused around the ideas of MOST people here. Most people hate women here. You're fine. You do you.

Buuuut most people out here are sexist dickheads. It is a group of primarily racists and sexists.

Normal people come here, respond only to the racists and sexists and then claim everyone is one. It's so they can feel better about themselves.

I encourage more incels to double down tbh. There's really no reasoning with IT. They're either willfully obtuse or actually ridiculously absent minded.

Do I feel sad that I'm ugly and too afraid of rejection and ridicule to find anyone? yes.

If you don't make any effort to get friends or a girlfriend, if you don't join any clubs or do anything social, then yes, your isolation is YOUR fault and yours alone.

I couldn't hope to care less about your virginity status. It's the self-hate and isolation that makes you seem weird.

so please stop labelling us as a group of racists and sexists.

The very vocal members of your sect project misogynistic, racist, assholish ideas loudly and prominently. Why don't you police them, if you disagree with their message and they're making you look bad? Oh! And have a chat with the crazier members of your club that keep going on about society wanting to murder/enslave incels. That garbage sounds insane. Mainly because no one actually gives a fuck about incels.

You will ignore this advice I'm sure, but what I want to say to you comes from sincerity and experience.

Take a good search inward. Typically the negativity in the world that incels attribute to their looks are ingrained in more deeply rooted character flaws. It could be as simple as social ineptitude or as obvious as you're a loud and obnoxious bigot. I'm not saying you're either of those things, but don't fall to the trap that incels allow themselves. Saying it's all bad because you're ugly is a coping mechanism. By saying it's all out of your control (which looks are) you are excusing yourself from having to deal with your own shit.

But that doesn't mean I'm a bad person or hate women.

Actually, you seem like a wonderful person. When incels get called misogynistic it's in reaction to posts saying women are less than men, deserve to be shot or sold as slaves. But just being a virgin doesn't make you misogynistic obviously. I hope things get better for you. High school is a cesspit and you're still so young. Don't give up on things getting better.

The perception of incels from IncelTears and normies is highly skewed. They fail to realize that incels are a result of their environment, rejected by society and taught to reject themselves. Repressing these feelings in early life manifests into highly toxic behavior that is then plastered on the internet. I'm inclined to believe that most incels aren't like that, rather they are displayed on a highlight reel in their most toxic moments.

Most importantly, they fail to see that incels are humans too. They have their wants and needs as well; to be loved, to be desired, to feel affection, to feel appreciated.

Incels, know that you are supported.

Sure, sure, that's a factor. Attention is oxygen for trolls. Obvious bait-threads aside though, a lot of really disturbing views are parroted in the comments too and rarely get the same IT attention a thread would.

That's my point. This sub allows that sort of language, which the majority of society would deem offensive and inappropriate so you can't be surprised to learn what people's perception of this sub, and others like it, are.